Senate President David Mark has foreclosed arguments on the proposed ban same sex marriage in Nigeria saying homosexuality “is offensive to our culture and tradition.”

Mark stated this on Monday when he declared open a public hearing on the Sex Marriage (Prohibition) Bill, proposed by Domingo Obende (PDP River State).

“Nothing on earth justifies same sex marriage,” he told participants at the public hearing. “My faith as a Christian abhors it. It is incomprehensible to contemplate on same sex marriage. I cannot understand it. I cannot be a party to it.”

 

http://dailytimes.com.ng/article/same-sex-marriage-taboo-says-mark

 

**remember - these are just opinions.  Please send your response to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it

 

We discuss David Marks refusal to sign the bill allowing same sex marriage - is this law neccesary in Africa?   Join Reynaldo and I as we go hard on this one.  You know how we do.   

Please note - this is an excerpt from the debate that took place with Reynaldo.  To listen to everything - please hit play.  To drop a comment you can either add yourself as a member of this site or alternatively  you can send your comments to Reynaldo (he is currently taking a break from social networking sites) by sending an email to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it . It will be routed to him.


Pam:  Have you been following what has been going on in the senate? How they want to make gay marriages legal and David Mark said no?

Reynaldo ( laughs): I have not been following it but it sounds stupido.   You know the problem with Nigerians is that we tend to leave the fire  on our roofs and try to kill the cockroach in the cupboard.  There is a fire burning down the house  which is that we are dying, everything is in a mess, people are hungry. Isn’t it more important that we take care of our economics, education, health, welfare of the people before  we start focusing on social issues?   How can one think of having sex or being gay and having a comfortable sex life when they have not had three square meals

Pam: You know that homosexuality has been in Nigeria for a long time.

Reynaldo:  Yes.  But, seriously we don’t have a gay issue - why do we want to be like Americans?

Pam: Many homosexuals are clamoring that they  be given the same right as others in society.  For example, both of us are heterosexual, we can do PDA’s and no one will raise an eyebrow regardless of whatever society we are in but for homosexuals that’s a different set of rules. They are forced to hide in the shadows because there are no laws protecting them.

Reynaldo: Let me tell you something there is no amount of law that you will make that will change a mind set.

Pam:  I am talking about a law that protects these people and make them feel just like everyone else.

Reynaldo:  In a country like Nigeria, there is no one upholding any laws.  So who will enforce the law and tell them that people should stop tying up their gay children and stop doing deliverance.  Because there is a mind set,  you can’t stop people from enforcing their mind set by you enforcing these laws.  The fact that you win a particular battle does not mean that the people will socially accept it.  How do you tell someone to change their sociology?  A law cannot enforce social change.  Social change has to come from the human being.   Personally, I think that laws are restrictive.  

Pam:  I get what you are saying but let’s bring this back to the USA - as far back as 5 years ago, gays were not as open as they are today.  When I go to the library, I see teenagers kissing.   Now, in the states,  people are more open to be who they are because here your humanity comes first before your sexuality.  Moreover, I don’t care who you decide to sleep with that’s your business but I do care.... like men on the down low bothers me.  Because I don’t’ know what they are bringing home.  You see my point is this with people being more open there will be no need for people on the down low.  


Reynaldo:  let me tell you something .  Till today, the black community does not accept gay men even if there are laws protecting them.   If your family does not accept you there is no law that will make them accept you.   The law cannot enforce the emotional.   That’s the reason that people are on the down low because their family will not accept them.  That’s the reason I feel this law is very irrelevant, because even if you put something in place, it won’t change the mind set.  You know we are putting something in place, that won’t make any significant difference.

Pam : I do agree that we do need to change our social mind set for things to work and unfortunately not everyone reasons that way -that’s the reason laws exist.  There is a need for laws to be in place to protect the weak.   David Mark is saying that there is no need for any such law to be passed in Nigeria.

You know that I live here in NY, whether you like it or not you will meet gay Nigerian men and women and you see them in many African events.  Many of them won’t have that kind of freedom to show this part of who they are in Nigeria because there is no law protecting them.  You know some of the reasons that David Mark refuses to accept this is that he believes that this this is an adapted western culture and also for religious reasons.    So does he have a point?



Reynaldo : Yes he does.  Because many don’t believe that it [homosexuality] is natural or it [homosexuality] is a norm.  It is not an instinctive inclination.   When religion now comes into this is that we have accepted religion as part of who we are as human beings.  Wars have been fought for people to accept religion. Thats the reason that jihad’s are fought - to force people to accept religion and because we can’t force everyone - now religion is now a choice.  

Now you are trying to tell people that their religion don’t matter and that they should accept things that are so catastrophically different from what their religion teaches.   We keep talking about all these social changes and everything going on.  My point is in all honesty - we are trying to scrap religion in an indirect way while some need that religion in their everyday life.  Without that religion - they won’t have structure.  Personally, I believe that it is all about education.  Even God does not force you to worship him - it is a choice you make but if you decide to worship him, you need to know that there are rules and conditions to worship him but the choice is yours to make.   We all have that one thing.  That one fundamental thing that we want to take away from everyone - our rights and our right to choice.   That’s the reason that I don’t like laws that limit social things.

Pam: I get your point

Reynaldo:  the law should be clear that it does not delve into areas that does not concern it.    For example in issues of domestic violence - let’s say that two people are fighting and the cops are called into it.  The person who gets taken away is the guy.  I think that in many cases that instead of the law protecting the person that it is meant to protect, it ends up harming someone else.

Pam:  Remember we are not dealing in a perfect world - remember these laws were created as a result of several instances of things happening in which women were hurt.   Yes, you are right and maybe in the example you give,  I am the one slapping you around but when they (police) come in they will take me out.  They are doing that because there are many instances in which it was men slapping women around and they will work from what happens in many of these cases .  Now, the question is should we say because of these exceptions that we should not have laws protecting people?     

Reynaldo:  I don’t have a problem with law, I am scared of the interpretation [of the law] because if we don’t have a law in place...it won’t be subject to interpretation.  

*** Now listen and tell us where you stand on this issue.  Do you think David Mark is right?  Do you think that there is a need for laws protecting people who have a different sexual orientation? Do you think that gay people should be given the right to get married in Nigeria?   Do you think that there are more important issues in Nigeria than this gay issue... talk back to us - This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it

 

 

Please take a listen - let us know what you think.  Is it a case of 'much ado about nothing' or is there something brewing?

Pamela's World